Thursday, September 23, 2010

$#*! My Closer Says

Yesterday was Hump Day for the rest of us, but it was Chump Day in a Queens court, as Frankie Knuckles (the closer formerly known as Francisco Rodriguez) appeared to face seven counts of criminal contempt charges.

The charges, stemming from 56 text messages sent by Mr. Knuckles to the mother of his two kids, were added to his original plethora of charges from the incident at Citi Field on August 11, when Mr. Knuckles foolishly assumed that the 11th was "Beat Your Dad-In-Law At Work Day".

In a not-so-stunning revelation to all except Omar Minaya, who claimed that he knew nothing about it, according to the Daily News, Mr. Knuckles allegedly assaulted his girlfriend five years ago in Venezuela, sending her to the hospital. The Assistant District Attorney brought forth Mr. Knuckles' past in an effort to show his history of violence.

Apparently, his fist pumps after recording the final out of his team's victories weren't just celebratory gestures. Whereas hitters would take batting practice to hone their hitting skills, Frankie Knuckles would pump his fist in what could only be called "battery practice".

After his arrest in August for using his fists, he decided to use his thumbs instead to get at the woman he "loves". The following are excerpts from Mr. Knuckles' texts to his girlfriend, Daian Peña:

"Thank you for sinking me and turning your back."

"Now I see you were with me because of the money."

"Your parents have what they have because of me."

"What are you going to tell the children when they grow up and we have nothing after you accused me and destroyed my career?"

So a man can be paid big bucks to play a child's game, but all the money in the world can't cause that man to stop behaving like a child. It was made clear to Mr. Knuckles that he was NOT to contact Miss Peña after his arrest. Apprently, he forgot this court-ordered decision 56 times!

Frankie Knuckles should never wear a Mets uniform again for the embarrassment he has caused to the team and its fans. If he is convicted of any or all of the charges brought forth against him, he should never wear any major league uniform.

Despite all of this, maybe we can cut a deal with him. He can give the Mets back the millions of dollars he is owed for 2011 and they can use it on a player that might actually contribute positively to the team and to the community. In return, the Mets will let him keep the orange part of the blue and orange uniform he used to wear in Flushing. He can even upgrade his uniform number from 75 to 007557.

I've heard there are plenty of catchers to choose from for pitchers in the pen. Maybe Mr. Knuckles will find a compatible battery mate on his new team.

Good riddance to Frankie Knuckles!

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