Joey's Soapbox: My Confusing 2012 World Series Pick

Hello, everyone.  I'm Joey Beartran and I'm one confused bear.  You see, I had the Cardinals playing the Tigers in the World Series, with St. Louis winning it all.  Although the Yankees obliged by playing dead in front of the Tigers, the Giants did not, winning the final three games of the NLCS to advance to the Fall Classic.

As a result, we're getting our first-ever Tigers-Giants World Series matchup. The two teams have met in four interleague series over the past decade, with the Giants holding a 7-5 edge in their 12 games, although the Tigers have won two of their last three series against San Francisco.

There is no bad blood between the two teams and no hatred between the two cities.  Basically, there's a whole lot of nothing going on, which does not make things easier for me to make my World Series pick.  But since I am Studious Metsimus' resident postseason prognosticator, I suppose I have a job to do.  Here goes (you guessed it) nothing.


World Series


Detroit Tigers vs. San Francisco Giants

As I stated before, there is no connection between the two cities in any sport.  San Francisco doesn't have a hockey team.  The Golden State Warriors play on the other side of the San Francisco Bay.  And the Detroit Lions have only defeated the San Francisco 49ers once in the last quarter century, losing 14 of their last 15 meetings since 1985.  That's not a rivalry.  And neither is Tigers-Giants.

Who would be happy if the Tigers won the World Series?  Kirk Gibson?  Ted Nugent?  Madonna?  Eminem?  Axel Foley?  Magnum P.I.?  Tony the Tiger?  (He would think a Tigers victory would be "grrrrrrrrrreat"!)

If San Francisco won its second title in three years, who would celebrate?  Joe Montana?  Keith Hernandez?  Tony Bennett?  Metallica?  Brian Wilson's beard?

Ha!  You thought this would be a photo of Brian Wilson's beard.  Well, it is Brian Wilson, but before he grew the beard.

Neither team has signature fans.  It's not like the Mets with Jerry Seinfeld, Matthew Broderick, Tim Robbins and Snooki.  In this year's World Series, you'll probably see celebrities in the stands who have no rooting interest in either team.  They'll just show up for five innings and conveniently mug for the cameras that always seem to find them.  Or better yet, if they're on a FOX television show, they'll get to be living, breathing, hot-dog munching advertisements for the shows they're on.

Am I rambling?  You bet your Billy Wagner bobblehead I am!  I'm stalling for time because I have no idea who to root for.

On the one paw, there's the Tigers, who have a strong starting rotation and fearsome middle-of-the-order.  With Justin Verlander and Max Scherzer, the Tigers have three brown eyes, one blue eye and two big-time strikeout pitchers.  And who can match the Tigers' one-two punch of Miguel Cabrera and Prince Fielder, who combined to hit .322 with 73 doubles, 74 HR and 247 RBI during the regular season.  Not only were both hitters extremely productive, they were also durable, with Fielder playing in all 162 games and Cabrera missing only one game.  Great starting pitching and great hitting goes a long way in the playoffs.

On the other paw, there's the Giants, who also have great starting pitching, a lineup that produces in the clutch, and ten million former Mets.  No, really.  I'm not exaggerating.

San Francisco took an entire team from New York in 1958.  Fifty-four years later, they settled for just a few ex-Mets.

Angel Pagan (a Met from 2008-2011) is the Giants' leadoff hitter and starting centerfielder.  Marco Scutaro (a Met in 2002 and 2003) just won the NLCS MVP Award by hitting .500 in the seven-game series against the Cardinals and playing a steady second base.  Joaquin Arias (a Met for 15 seconds in 2010) has done well off the bench, hitting .375 in the postseason with two doubles.  Even Xavier Nady (a Met for not enough time in 2006) is a Giant.  Okay, so not every ex-Met has done well in the playoffs for the Giants.  I'm talking about Guillermo Mota (a Met in 2006 and 2007), who has allowed four runs on six hits in 1⅔ innings.  But Mets fans would rather forget about Mota, especially ones who remember the Mike Piazza spring training incident when Mota was a Dodger.

So we have the Tigers in one dugout and the Giants on the other.  Both teams have great starting pitching.  The Giants have better relievers.  The Tigers have the big boppers.  The Giants have the most former Mets.  Decisions, decisions.  Which team should I take?  Hmmm...

By the power of Grayskull, I think I've got it!

Prediction:  The World Series will go 7 games and someone will win.


There, that wasn't so hard now, was it?  I didn't want to pick San Francisco because then Ted Nugent would shoot me and claim it was because I was a wild bear.  I didn't want to pick Detroit because James Hetfield and the rest of the guys from Metallica would chase me into Brian Wilson's beard, a place where bears check in, but they don't check out.  So I'll just say the World Series will go the distance and it'll be a fun, competitive series where both teams will fight to the very last pitch.

Now if you'll excuse me, I'm about to get ready to watch the Fall Classic with a friend who you might say has a rooting interest.  Maybe it's a good thing I didn't pick Detroit to win it all or else I'd never get the remote control back.  Enjoy the series, everyone!

Lou Seal can have the remote.  I'll keep my paws on the chocolate and corn chips.