A Double Dose of Dickeypedia

There are times when R.A. Dickey's words of wisdom cannot be contained. They can come at you from every direction, just like an Oliver Perez fastball. So it should come as no surprise that Bill Madden's article on the Mets' knuckler/wordsmith in today's Daily News touched upon a topic that made us consult Dickeypedia.

In 2005, R.A. Dickey was coming off his second consecutive poor season for the Texas Rangers. As a result, Dickey was asked by the Rangers to consult knuckleball guru (and former Ranger pitcher) Charlie Hough so he could learn the nuances of the nomadic pitch. In discussing Hough's influence on Dickey's career-saving pitch, the Mets' righty professed:

"Charlie taught me the rudiments of the knuckleball. He changed my grip to help with the consistency and make it mechanically more compact."

Later on, Dickey discussed how he went to Atlanta a few years after studying under Charlie Hough. There he met the Pai Mei of knuckleball instructors, Phil Niekro. After some time in the film room, Niekro made some minor changes to Dickey's delivery, evolving the pitch into what it has become.

Dickey came out of the meeting with Niekro as a new man with a devastating new pitch. So overjoyed was Dickey that he let his extensive vocabulary describe the feeling:

"Only a few people have the knuckleball vernacular. But as Phil told me, the one design of the pitch is to get people out."

R.A. Dickey learned how to throw the knuckleball so he could get people out. However, his penchant for spitting out SAT words as if they were sunflower seeds has gotten people's dictionaries out as well.

For those who only got credit on their SAT for spelling their names correctly, here are the definitions for the words "rudiments" and "vernacular":

rudiments:

• 1. the elements or first principles of a subject.
• 2. a mere beginning, first slight appearance, or undeveloped or imperfect form of something.

vernacular:

• 1. the native speech or language of a place.
• 2. the language or vocabulary particular to a class or profession.

R.A. Dickey showed us the proper way to use those words in sentences. To show you how NOT to use these words properly, we decided to contact former Met closer (and receiver of fan wrath) Armando Benitez to give us his input. In less time than he used to take to blow a crucial save, Benitez came up with these wild pitches of wisdom.

"I don't understand why Mets fans were always booing me. I always went out there and gave 100%. If that's not good enough, then tough. I won't be disrespected, so they better not be rudiments to me."

If that isn't enough for you, Benitez decided to reflect on one "disrespectful" moment in his Mets career. You might remember it as the ninth inning, game-tying, three-run homer he gave up to San Francisco's J.T. Snow in the second game of the 2000 NLDS.

"After that game, I was confronted by a Mets fan who was at the game, but couldn't get tickets. He decided to watch the game from across McCovey Cove. He told me that from where he was, he didn't even need vernaculars to see that I had just served up a meaty pitch for Snow to hit."

If only Armando Benitez had consulted Dickeypedia first, he might not have made a fool of himself when talking about Mets fans who weren't happy with his version of 100%. Then again, we are talking about the guy who put the "BS" in Blown Save...

That's all for this edition of "Dickeypedia Word of the Week". Be here next time as we proceed with your education while former Mets continue to suffer their humiliation.

Ferecito Says "¡Ay Dios Mio!" To Bill Madden's Article

So yesterday I was looking for something to blog about and I came across an interesting article by Bill Madden in the Daily News. If you're too lazy to click on the link or if you're boycotting Studious Metsimus for not having many new blogs recently, I'll quote Madden's short paragraph on the Mets.

"They won't spend the money for Holliday, Bay or Lackey and apparently, they're only interested in signing low-budget Latin players, having shown little or no interest in Byrd, Figgins, DeRosa, Wolf or even Staten Island's Jason Marquis, while waiting for their markets to come to them. At the same time, the Phillies and Braves wasted no time in addressing their needs. Sad."

For those of you who didn't boycott our silly little site and clicked on the link to Madden's article, you might notice a certain word missing from the article that appeared in the quote above. The word is question is "Latin". Today, the word doesn't appear in the blog. When it was originally published yesterday, it was there.

It looks like Mr. Madden got a little bit of a backlash from what he wrote. Yes, the Mets re-signed Alex Cora and then signed their catcher of the day, Henry Blanco. Both players are Latinos. However, they also signed Chris Coste. Last time I checked, he wasn't a Latin player.

Even Fred Armisen's Saturday Night Live character, Ferecito, would be offended by Madden's original statement. His trademark "Ay, Dios Mio" ("Oh, my God" to those who failed first-grade Spanish) would be quite appropriate to describe his feelings for Madden's comment.

I guess Madden is now using Ferecito's other catch phrase when he recanted his original statement. ("I'm just keeeeding!")

Shame on Madden for even considering putting that in print. If the Mets were to go after only Jason Bay, Matt Holliday, Jason Marquis, or Studious Metsimus' man-crush John Lackey, would Madden have channeled his inner George Jefferson by saying that the Mets are only interested in signing honkies? (I apologize for using the word honkies. I'm just trying to make a point and I miss watching great shows like "The Jeffersons".)

To those of you who have boycotted Studious Metsimus for the lack of blogs, boycott Bill Madden instead. We're an equal opportunity offender, not like Bill Madden. Shame on you, Mr. Madden. As Ferecito would say, "Ay Dios Mio" indeed!