Saturday, August 15, 2009

Survival of The Dead: New Romero flick or Mets' September Goal

King of the zombie subgenre of horror movies, George A. Romero (bow before his picture! He is to zombie movies what Keith Hernandez is to mustachioed men!) has announced that the sixth installment of his "Dead" series will make its world premiere at the Toronto Internationl Film Festival in September. "Survival of The Dead" will feature Romero's trademark social commentary hidden beneath the sea of gore and pig intestines.

However, is the title of his new film also appropriate to describe what the Mets have to do as they approach the last month of the 2009 baseball season?

Several players have experienced what were originally classified minor injuries and have turned them into season-long maladies. Carlos Delgado will not be coming back in mid-August as was originally stated. He will be fighting for his next contract from the trainer's table. Jose Reyes has had plenty of time to fidget with his new hairstyle while he has been "recovering" from his injury. Carlos Beltran might be closest to returning, but is it a good thing if he does?

The zombies clearly studied how Luis Castillo makes his way around the bases.

I have a feeling Citi Field was built on a cemetery that did not have the bodies exhumed properly. That could explain two things. First, it could be the reason for the abundance of injuries suffered by the Mets this season. Also, it could explain why it's taken so long for the players to return to full strength, as a zombie bite is not quick to heal.

In fact, if I were Omar Minaya, I'd trade some of the players away before they start to decompose. At least that way, the Mets can get something in return, preferably a player with a pulse. We already got Victor Zombie-rano once. We don't need another similar player.

Victor Zombie-rano would give up homers to everyone, including current Met pitcher Livan Hernandez.

George A. Romero will make zombie fans such as myself giddy with "Survival of the Dead" next month. Let's hope the Mets can survive September as well as they can. It's too bad their season died a long time ago...

ZCB Special Report: David Wright was hit in the head by a 94 MPH fastball thrown by Giants' pitcher Matt Cain. This occurred approximately one hour after this blog was published. Dig up those bodies at Citi Field already! Daniel Murphy is the only one left from the Mets' Opening Day lineup in Cincinnati that hasn't missed time due to injuries.

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