We're Off To Flee The Blizzard (To Port St. Lucie We Will Go!)

The weather outside may be frightful, but come tomorrow, it'll be sooooo delightful. While everyone in the northeast is digging their way out of the snow, I will be a special guest of The Coop in Port St. Lucie. That's right, SMFs. I'm on my way to Spring Training!

We'll be checking out the Mets players to see if they're learning their fundamentals. We'll be checking out the Mets trainers to make sure they're not the same ones as last year. We'll be checking out Duffy's for their fine adult beverage selection. (Remind me to bring my "special" ID.)

Maybe we'll take some exclusive photos with players. Perhaps I'll get a Studious Metsimus interview with Sgt. Bay of The Yukon over a plate of cheese fries with gravy. If he chooses to have poutine instead, that's his choice.

One thing we'll definitely have is FUN, FUN, FUN! When we return Sunday night, I will write my happy recap with all the details of our Port St. Lucie trip. I'm sure my colleague will write a blog or two while I'm gone, assuming he doesn't spend his entire weekend shoveling snow.

Actually, I could use that shovel to dig myself out of the Florida sand. What's that? There's no sand in Port St. Lucie? No worries. I'm hangin' with Miss Cooper! (And the Mets!) It doesn't get any better than this! See you when I get back (if I get back...)

Pitchers And Catchers And Bears, Oh My!

Welcome to the latest Joey blog for Studious Metsimus. This blog will pertain to those three words everyone can't wait to hear. No, those words aren't "FREE CHICKEN NACHOS", although those wouldn't be bad right now. The words bring warmth on a cold winter's day. They evoke childhood memories of playing catch with your dad.


Those three beautiful words that all baseball fans love to hear are...


PITCHERS AND CATCHERS!!!

That's right, SMFs! Today the Mets' pitchers and catchers reported to Port St. Lucie to begin their six-week stay in the hopes of getting their groove back. After a dismal 2009 season in which the Mets decided to hibernate months before October, there is hope that the team can bounce back to respectability and perhaps even more than that.

Other than Carlos Beltran, the team has canceled their membership to the Injury of The Week Club. 2010 should be the year the Mets show us if the poor record of 2009 was based on the players losing so many games due to injuries or if it was because the team just isn't as good as they were from 2006-2008, when they averaged 91 victories per season.

The Mets added Sgt. Bay of The Yukon to patrol the vast expanses of the Northwest Territories at Citi Field. But other than that, all they seemed to do was add a boatload of backstops. They did not change any members of Johan Santana and The Four Rainouts. They did not upgrade at first base. They did not get rid of Stupid Is (Fred Wilpon, the Brooklyn Dodger fan formerly known as Mutt) and Stupid Does (Jeff Wilpon, the Daddy's boy formerly known as Jeff), not that they would have fired themselves.

With the Phillies, Marlins, Braves and Nationals all filling in numerous holes on their respective teams, can the Mets seriously expect to be contenders by adding Jason Bay, no starting pitchers and every catcher except Crash Davis and Jake Taylor?



No one knows for sure how the Mets will do in 2010. That's the beauty of spring training. Everyone comes in with equal expectations and everyone comes in tied for first, except the Pittsburgh Pirates, who are already a dozen games out of first place in the NL Central.

If the catchers can settle The Four Rainouts down and get them to pitch effectively, the team might be able to contend for more than just the first two months of the season.

However, there are still too many question marks on this team to consider. Will Jose Reyes be the speed demon he used to be? Will David K. Wright regain his power stroke? Will the Mets stop ending games by dropping infield pop-ups and hitting into unassisted triple plays? Those questions will be answered as the season progresses.

For now, I'm packing up my ball and glove and heading out to Port St. Lucie. That's right, SMFs. Joey's going to spring training! I'll be there with Coop from My Summer Family next weekend, hoping to get exclusive photos of Mets players while they're still uninjured.

When I return, I hope to post another blog about my adventures in the PSL. Maybe I'll interview a player or two. Maybe I'll get Coop to buy me an adult beverage.

Those are too many maybes, but there is one thing I'm DEFINITELY sure about. I LOVE PITCHERS AND CATCHERS! Be sure to come back to Studious Metsimus next week to read my recap on the Port St. Lucie trip...assuming I decide to come back from sunny Florida, of course!

Nah, who am I kidding? After all, I have to be the first in line at Citi Field on Opening Day when the chicken nacho stand opens for business!

A Much Better Blog On The Citi Field Tour

Last month, I posted a blog on my Citi Field tour with Coop. (Click here for that blog.) The pictures I took were okay, even if my Studious Metsimus colleague decided to pop into most of them.

However, for a much better blog on the tour, please read this post from our friends at My Summer Family. Tell MSF that Joey sent you!

Now if you'll excuse me, my colleague has to test the microphone in the Citi Field press conference room, just in case Omar Minaya decides to use it again over the next few days.

Studious Metsimus Presents The Happy/Crappy Recap For 2009

It's the end of another year and Studious Metsimus would like to recap 2009 for you, followed by a thank you to some of our special readers and fellow bloggers who helped make Studious Metsimus what it is today.

It all began so well for the Mets in 2009. Then the Star-Spangled Banner was sung on Opening Day and everything fell apart. Injury after injury turned into loss after loss and the Mets could only manage a 70-92 record, good for fourth place in the NL East.

To make matters worse, Mets fans were subjected to the Doomsday World Series between the Yankees and the Phillies. Some major retooling had to be done after the World Series was completed and the Mets almost waited for 2009 to end before they made any noise in the free agent market, finally acquiring Jason Bay before the calendar changed to 2010.

The 2009 season saw the premiere of Citi Field with the Citi Kitty cursing the Mets on Opening Night. It also saw dropped popups, the Tony Bernazard Strongman Competition (probably seen on ESPN 2 sometime after 3 AM), the rise and fall of the Three Fernandos, David Wright's head-seeking missile and too many other moments that made this a forgettable season.

Fortunately, Studious Metsimus has something to be thankful for. To our readers such as Señor Solly, Satish, Jason, Efrain, Tracy and Anonymous (thank you to Anonymous for leaving the most comments), we'd like to thank you for your readership. You helped us surpass our goal of having two readers in 2009. Your comments were always appreciated and made us want to write more quality stories to hide the fact that the Mets really sucked this year.

To Kelly, thank you so much for designing the Studious Metsimus logo. It gave the site credibility that our excuse for writing would not have been able to get on its own. The writing got better once we said to ourselves, "Oh, crap! We look like a professional Mets blog. We'd better made the writing match the beautiful logo!"

To Denise, thank you for convincing us that we had some talent. Without your encouragement (and Kelly's as well), we wouldn't have started blogging on the Mets, first on Mets Merized Online, then expanding to Studious Metsimus.

To Joe D, thank you for giving us our first break. Without the opportunity you gave us, we never would have grown the cojones to start Studious Metsimus. We're waving our David Wright Pom Poms that we borrowed from Bayonne Mets Fan to show our appreciation for everything you've done for us.

To Jon and Lisa, thank you for teaching the two-member Studious Metsimus staff that sometimes squawking is the way to go to attract attention to our blog. Don't give up hope, Jon. We'll always have 1986. And Lisa, you may be the only Yankee fan who's cool in the eyes of Studious Metsimus. Even Joey thinks so!

Last, but certainly not least, we must give a shout out to Coop. For inspiring a number of blogs, for taking the Studious Metsimus staff on a tour of Citi Field, for being you...thank you. Hopefully, Joey will be able to persuade you to join the Studious Metsimus staff in 2010. You're a legend in the blogosphere and we'd love to have you!

From Joey and I, we'd like to wish you all the best for a happy and healthy 2010. Thank you for supporting Studious Metsimus and as always, LET'S GO METS !!

Ask Professeur Bay To Learn English, Canadian Style!

During Shea Stadium's last years, fans in attendance were treated to Jose Reyes attempting to teach them Spanish through his clever "Ask Professor Reyes" segments that were seen on DiamondVision between innings.

Once Reyes left the Mets lineup in 2009 due to his injury, Professor Reyes also waved goodbye. So who will teach the fans a foreign language in 2010? How about native Canadian Jason Bay?

If you've ever had a conversation with a Canadian, you've probably noticed that certain words don't sound the same to our American ears. All you have to do is listen to the songs of Anne Murray or Celine Dion to know that Canadian crap sounds different than American crap.

Studious Metsimus has decided to administer the oath to Jason Bay so that he can teach you the proper way to speak like a Canadian. Once he finishes taking his oath to be our new professor, he'll be ready to begin class. My Studious Metsimus colleague, Joey, will be Professeur Bay's first student.


Greetings, class! I'm Professeur Bay. Our first word today will be "about". Please repeat the following sentence.

"When I report to Citi Field, I will be the first person to be out and about on the playing field."

When I report to Citi Field, I will be the first person to be oot and aboot on the playing field.






Um, no. Let's move on to the next word. The next word is "sorry".

"I'm sorry that the Mets organization had so many injuries that kept them out of contention."

I'm sawry that the Mets organ-eye-zation had so many injuries that kept them oot of contention.






Now it sounds like you're making fun of me. Please don't take advantage of the fact that Canadians are painfully polite. It's very rude. Anyway, before we continue, I have a question for you. Do you like Popeye, the cartoon character?



Of course! Who doesn't like Popeye? But my favorite character is Wimpy. He's always eating burgers. I wish I could eat burgers all the time!





Oh, you like Wimpy. Okay. Do you remember what Wimpy would always say when he wanted burgers and was about to pay for them?




Of course I remember. But I get the feeling you're going to tell me anyway.







Give that bear a high five! Okay, here's your last word. I'll use it in that sentence Wimpy would say. Ready?





Grumble, grumble...








The word is "Tuesday".

"I'll gladly pay you a loony next Tuesday for a burger today."

What's a loony?








Sigh. It's what we call a dollar.








So why didn't you just call it that? And can I get some fries with that burger? Maybe add a little cheese and gravy on those fries?






You mean poutine?

Jigga what?

POUTINE!! That's what we call those fries you're looking for.

You know what? You're not supposed to eat in class anyway. Just say the sentence, eh?

I'll gladly pay you a loony next Tooz-dee for a burger today. But I'm not saying poo-tin, eh? Especially when all I want are fries with gravy and cheese.

Forget this gig! I'm leaving! Class dismissed!

Was it something I said? Should I have asked for Kraft Dinner instead?

This concludes our first and final installment of Ask Professeur Bay. If this got under Jason's skin, imagine what the New York media will do to him.

Oh, well. We can always persuade Jose Reyes back into the professor's chair. He's supposed to be healthy enough to teach, right? Well? Is he? Ay, caramba!

Baywatch Canceled; Mets Fans Thrilled, Hasselhoff Still Drunk

The Mets finally got their man. The beaches of Flushing are now safe thanks to Jason Bay patrolling its shores.

With a four-year, $66 million offer, the left field problem has now been solved and the Mets can move on to filling their other holes now that the Baywatch is no longer on the air.

Reactions from fans to the Bay signing has been mostly positive. Here are samples from some of them:


Joey B. from the Bronx: It's about time the Mets fixed their leak in left field. I'll be sitting in Section 138 next year and look forward to seeing Jason Bay up close and personal. I just hope he doesn't do anything special while I'm standing on line at Shake Shack for three innings or so.

Jerry S. from Long Island: Did you ever notice that Omar Minaya waits for holidays to acquire big names? Johan Santana was signed on Groundhog Day in 2008 and Pedro Martinez was acquired after Thanksgiving in 2004. Does that mean we should expect Bengie Molina on New Year's Day and another starting pitcher will be a Met on Martin Luther King Day? It looks like I'll be having a Happy Festivus indeed!

Tim R. from Hollywood: I'm glad the Mets made this acquisition. It takes the sting away from my breakup with my long-term partner, Sue. Did you know that we were together since 1986, the last year the Mets won the World Series? By the way, I heard the Mets are also looking for a pitcher and a catcher. My buddy, Crash, and I might be what you're looking for. You bloggers have some pull with the team, right?


Jay and S. Bob from Leonardo, NJ: My hetero-lifemate and I once smoked a fatty with Jason Bay before he came to the states from Canada. We were standing outside a Tim Horton's, he came by and bickety-bam. Before you know it, he was making waves in the majors, Berserker-style. Snoogans. Dude still owes me an Egg-A-Mooby Muffin, though.

David H. from the Betty Ford Clinic: Why is everyone making such a big deal about this? Is he big in Germany? No. I am! All this talk about Baywatch being canceled is making me sick. Now get me another burger and a beer! Hiccup!


There you have it, my friends. To recap, Jason Bay is a Met. Fans from Section 138 to some guy who asks too many questions to a few stoners who made a Quick Stop to talk to Studious Metsimus even though they weren't supposed to be here to a drunkard who claims to have been big in Germany all have their opinions on the signing. At least we finally have something to talk about!

Now excuse me while I calm down that David H. guy. Apparently, he's saying something about some Pamela A. chick and her beach volleyballs. At least, that's what I think he's saying.

Pitching In For The Tug McGraw Foundation

Frank Edwin McGraw, Jr. made his major league debut for the New York Mets in 1965. He was not very effective as a starting pitcher so in 1969, he became a reliever on a full-time basis. Unfortunately, he did not pitch in the 1969 World Series even though he collected 12 saves during the regular season.

After a few mediocre seasons, the Mets appeared to be headed down that same path in 1973. Then the man known to all as Tug fired up the team and its fans when he reminded everyone that the season was not yet over. "Ya Gotta Believe" became the mantra for the underdog Mets as they went from last place in August to winning the division title the day after the regular season ended.

The magic continued in the playoffs as the Mets eliminated heavily favored Cincinnati in the National League Championship Series and took the defending champion Athletics to the seventh game of the World Series before ultimately succumbing to Oakland.

When Tug McGraw was traded from the Mets to the Philadelphia Phillies after the 1974 season, he was the franchise leader in saves and games pitched, a mark which is now held by another lefty who wore #45, John Franco.

McGraw helped the Phillies win their first ever World Series in 1980, recording the final out of the sixth and deciding game against another team seeking their first championship, the Kansas City Royals. He pitched four more seasons in Philadelphia, retiring after the 1984 season.

Fast forward to 2003. It was on March 12 that McGraw received the shocking news that he had a malignant, inoperable brain tumor. Although he was only given weeks to live, he managed to live throughout 2003 before finally passing away on January 5, 2004.

Before his death, the Tug McGraw Foundation was established. Its mission is to enhance the quality of life for children and adults with brain tumors and to raise awareness and money for brain tumor research. (Recently, the Foundation was expanded to include Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder and Traumatic Brain Injury.)

In 2003, just months before he passed away, Tug McGraw was in attendance at Shea Stadium. He was signing autographs along with former Met second baseman Felix Millan at the Fan Fest that was held prior to weekend games at Shea. I was in attendance that day, but noticed McGraw and Millan after they had signed their last autographs. I was disappointed, feeling that I had missed my chance to meet McGraw, a man who pitched before my time but was very much a part of what made me into the Mets fan I am today.

As he was leaving, the Tugger picked up a T-shirt that was being given away that day and flung it out to the crowd. (Although he was a southpaw, I'll never forget that he tossed it into the crowd with his right hand.) Guess who caught that shirt?

No, it wasn't Joey who caught the shirt. He hadn't even been born yet! He just likes doing his Vanna White impersonation whenever there's a photo op. The shirt above is the one Tug McGraw threw into the crowd that I was fortunate enough to catch. To this day, I have never worn the shirt since his fingerprints are still on it.

Note the "Believe" logo (after Tug's famous phrase) on the shirt, directly over the depiction of a Mets Master Card. If you have a Mets Master Card (or any credit card), perhaps you'd like to make a donation to the Tug McGraw Foundation.

Sharon Chapman, a friend of the Studious Metsimus staff, will be running in the 2010 ING New York City Marathon to raise money for the Tug McGraw Foundation. Her goal is to raise $3,000 for brain tumor research. Please help Sharon reach her goal by clicking here and making a donation to Team McGraw.

Tug McGraw was a hero to many Mets fans during his tenure with the team. Almost six years after his passing, he is still a hero to many people who are benefiting from the progress being made in brain tumor research due to the Tug McGraw Foundation.

In 1973, Tug McGraw brazenly proclaimed "Ya Gotta Believe" to all the world. With your help, ya gotta believe that the quality of life will improve for people with brain tumors. From all of us at Studious Metsimus, we'd like to thank you for helping Sharon reach her goal and for your support of the Tug McGraw Foundation. We believe. So should you!

A December To Remember! Citi Field Tour Pics!

With oodles of thanks going out to Coop, these are some pictures from our Citi Field tour today. This tour was given to season ticket holders and I must say that they did a great job with it. From bringing out the 1969 and 1986 World Series trophies and allowing fans to take as many pics as they wanted with Mr. Met, to walking on the field and unsuccessfully calling the bullpen for a lefty, this was certainly a December to remember for this Mets blogger. Here are some pictures for your viewing enjoyment.

My Studious Metsimus colleague, Joey, was excited to get his first all-access tour of Citi Field. Too bad he missed the first few minutes because he was stuck in this tree.

This is in the production booth. This screen controls what goes up on the scoreboard. From kiss cam to birthday greetings to the tenth call to the bullpen, this is the place where it's all put on the scoreboard and CitiVision.

This is where Gary, Keith and Ron give us great joy during Mets telecasts, since the events taking place on the field surely don't give us any kind of joy.

This is the view from the media room. Non-bloggers get to sit here behind clear glass (bet you couldn't tell there was glass in front of the camera where this picture was taken) and watch the game in a beautiful air-conditioned environment. Where do bloggers get to sit?

We get to sit right here in the bloggers' room. Not the best view of Citi Field, but at least the floor tiles are lovely.


This is a room I had no idea existed. Although my colleague mistook it for a coffee break room, it's really an auditorium located just above the Jackie Robinson Rotunda.

We finally did what the majority of the people came to do. We got onto the field without being tackled by security! The warning track area is a very hard surface. I can't imagine making a diving catch on it without receiving many cuts and bruises. Then again, that's what the 15-day DL is for, even if it was overused this past season.


These are seats we'll never be able to afford on our Studious Metsimus salary. Then again, we can't even afford Shake Shack burgers on our Studious Metsimus salary. Someone has to talk to the boss about that one. What? I am the boss? Sometimes it sucks to work for the man.

It's Coop from My Summer Family sharing a tender moment with my colleague in the Mets dugout. I guess this is My Winter Family.

My colleague is waiting patiently for his turn at-bat. I hope David Wright's oversized helmet isn't the one they give him.

These are the indoor batting cages near the Mets clubhouse. This may teach them how to hit 95-MPH fastballs and biting curveballs, but can it teach them how to hit with less than two outs and a runner on third?

Here we have the Mets clubhouse. It needed expanding because of all the minor league players called up to replace the disabled regulars. After sitting in those couches, I can see myself being placed on the 15-day DL just so I can sit here during games. They're oh so comfy!

This is the game room directly across the hall from the clubhouse and training room. (Insert joke about Mets trainers here.) The tour guide told us that Nelson Figueroa introduced the team to Rock Band (see the drums near the big plasma TV). He also said that Figgy is the team's resident IT guy. If you need a computer fixed, Nelly Figs is the man. Studious Metsimus could not get a straight answer from the tour guide when asked about Figueroa's pool expertise. Perhaps this is something worth following up.

If you're wondering why the Joey half of the Studious Metsimus duo was the only one photographed, the answer is simple. Three words: Mickey Mouse Ears. You will never know what I mean by that, but if you did, you'd know why none of my photos from the Citi Field tour will ever see the light of day.

WHILENOONE'SWATCHING,JOEYHASTAKENOVERTHISBLOG.

Greetings, SMFs! While my colleague is away, I decided to add a little something to his blog. It came to my attention that he was not going to share any of his pictures from the Citi Field tour with you. Shame on him for hiding them from you, our beloved readers.

Well, it so happens that I have found the main picture that caused him to become Ebenezer Scrooge. So Bah humbug to him! I'm going to share the infamous Mickey Mouse Ears picture that he wants no one to see.

Thanks to everyone for reading this blog and we hope to see you next year at Citi Field. Happy Hanukkah, Merry Christmas and send cake. (NOT fruit cake! BIG difference!) Enjoy the Mickey Mouse Ears picture of my colleague!