Wednesday, July 22, 2009

We Need To Start A Fire

Every team goes through rough times. When a team isn't playing well, a manager might feel the need to throw things around in the clubhouse or go off on his players with an expletive-laden tirade. Do I feel that flying objects or a few foul words can turn the fortunes of a team around? F**k no!

A simple ditty can do the trick. That's why I have taken a classic Billy Joel song and tweaked it a little in the hopes that the Mets will hear it and feel inspired. Let's see if it works. Without further delay, here is "We Need To Start A Fire".

(Verse 1)
Opener against the Reds
'Han and Mike start for the Mets
Victories for Mr. Smooth as well as Big Pelf.
Ollie flounders in game three
Mets fly from Cincinnati
Feeling pretty confident and blessed with good health.

Moving on to Florida
'Han went to the media
Telling them how Daniel Murphy dropped a fly ball.
That set off a firestorm
Soon it would become the norm
Players making errors and several pratfalls.

(Chorus)
We need to start a fire
Omar's still not learning
Our stomachs are churning
We need to start a fire
Soon we'll need to light it
Rather than just hide it

(Verse 2)
Citi Field replaces Shea
April 13, what a day
Tom Terrific takes the mound and tosses a strike.
David Wright ties up the game
But the fans are left ashamed
'Cause the Mets lost to the Padres on that first night.

Look, another Ollie walk
Front office starting to talk
Did we make an error signing him for three years?
Oh, he's injured; never mind
R & R will do him fine
Other starters will come through allaying our fears.

(Repeat chorus)

(Verse 3)
J.J. Putz and Johnny Maine
More pitchers injured again
Temporary setbacks; that is what Omar thinks.
Delgado injured his hip
Yet another DL trip
This is the beginning of a season-long jinx.

Jose Reyes then goes down
Omar's smile turns to a frown
Thinking it's impossible that this will get worse.
Alex Cora then steps in
Omar claims this team can win
After all, we're only a few games out of first.

(Repeat chorus)

(Verse 4)
Still the Mets tried to compete
Even though they felt some heat
Playing dull, scoring null; yet another obstacle.
Fans root on their favorite sons
They're still not hitting home runs
How many times can they pray for OMIR-acle?

A-Rod then pops up the ball
Louie tries to make the call
Make the play! Oy, vey! Nothing more that I can say!

(Repeat chorus)

(Verse 5)
Now we can't find ways to win
Another player hurt again
Carlos Beltran, now he's gone.
Who's next - Gary, Keith or Ron?

Guys not healing wounds on time
Fast approaching trade deadline
Halladay won't help this staff
Better write our epitaph

All misfortune on this ride
Mr. Met tried suicide
Place your bets; Wilpons' debts
No one's saying Let's Go Mets.

Injuries bit at the core
This team is a great big bore
Epic fail trying to score
I can't take it anymore!

(Final chorus)
We need to start a fire
Omar's still not learning
Our stomachs are churning
We need to start a fire
We did not set one
So the season's done...it's done...it's done...it's done...



1 comment:

Anonymous said...

My friend, this is excellent!! Good job!!