...And The Winner Is: STUDIOUS METSIMUS

There you have it! It's a new era in Mets blogging, as Studious Metsimus has arrived! A new name, a new look, a new banner (...and what a gorgeous banner it is! I needed something that beautiful SOONER than later!)

This site has changed its name more times than Prince. We used to be known as "Zombies and Comics and Bears...Oh My!", then came "It's A Mets Mets Mets Mets World", followed by fifteen minutes of another name that I will not write here because silly me didn't notice that someone else already had that name.

However, I had brains on my mind and "Ed's Smart-Ass Mets Site" wasn't very kid-friendly, so I was thinking for a moment while watching the Mets game. I felt an itch on my brain so I decided to scratch my gluteus maximus.

That's when the cartoon lightbulb appeared over my head. I shut it off quickly because it wasn't a fluorescent bulb and I need to conserve energy. Going green is cool unless if you're Sean "No Neck" Green.

Before I shut off the light, I took my crayons and scribbled out the new name of the site. No, I did not choose Gluteus Maximus. Behold its rhyming cousin, STUDIOUS METSIMUS!

Studious Metsimus will be your new home for smart Mets commentary and silly little blogs. From game recaps to Joey's musings to the "I Hate Joe Orsulak" feature (I'm sure you can't wait to find out what that's all about. So do I! I haven't written one yet!), this will be your place when you want something a little different with your Mets fix!

Relax, have an adult beverage (I'm not talking about Metamucil, although that name would be appropriate for this site, wouldn't it?) and enjoy the blogs! I'll do my best to make sure you won't be disappointed. Thanks for visiting and LET'S GO METS!!

O Billy, Where Art Thou?

This is Joey here. I'm disappointed in the Mets right now. It's not because of their record or their injuries. It's not even because they don't have a Cake Shack at Citi Field to satisfy my red velvet cravings.

I'm unhappy because my fav'rit player, Billy Wagner, is now with the Red Sox. I will never be able to play air drums at Citi Field again as "Enter Sandman" has been silenced.

I promise you that I will see Billy again. It doesn't matter if I have to walk all the way to Boston, but I will play those drums again when he comes into a game!

I will travel to the ends of the earth for my fav'rit player. Neither rain, nor sleet, nor bad burritos will prevent me from reaching my final destination. If I have to march through dense tropical rain forests with my #13 jersey in tow until I find my beloved Billy, I will do it.

If I run out of water while traveling through the harsh sun-soaked Connecticut desert, I will trudge on. Even if I get tangled in the dangerous bushes of Rhode Island without being able to get to my machete, I will not despair. Billy will get me there.


I've been told that if I make a wrong turn in Worcester, I might end up in Vermont. Since I don't have pockets in my Mets hoodie, I cannot carry a GPS device with me, so an unscheduled trip to the Green Mountain State is a possibility.

I've heard there is plenty of maple syrup in Vermont, which reminds me that I still need my cake fix. When in Vermont, I have to do as the Monties do. That means my cake of choice will be pancakes! Therefore, if I do end up in Vermont, I will climb a tree with my Billy Wagner jersey nearby and get my own maple syrup. Then I'll get directions and continue my trek to Boston.

Once I get to Boston, I will temporarily switch allegiances from the Mets to the Red Sox. I will break out my new personalized Billy Wagner Red Sox jersey, but everyone will know who my fav'rit player is, even up in Beantown!


I will enjoy a Fenway Frank, but stay away from the Green Monster. That's because I'm five years old and I'm still at that age where monsters are scary. When Billy comes into the ballgame in the eighth inning, I will play my air drums when the opening riff of "Enter Sandman" is played. I will be emotional but I will play on!

Then I will leave right after Billy's one-two-three inning and put my Mets jersey back on as I make my way back through the bushes, rain forests and deserts. Speaking of deserts, I will make another stop in Vermont for dessert. However, this time I can say with certainty that I will not be lost.

I could stay until the game ends, but then I'd have to sit through "Sweet Caroline" in the middle of the eighth inning. I'm sorry, but you can't have Metallica as an opening act for Neil Diamond.

Billy Wagner, I will miss you running out of the Mets bullpen. I'm thankful that you made two final appearances for the Mets at Citi Field and will never forget your contributions to the team. You will always be my fav'rit player no matter what jersey you wear. Good luck, Billy! This bear will always love you!

It's A Mets Mets Mets Mets World Is On The Air!

Thank you! Thank you all! You're too kind! Thank you and welcome to the first blog for the recently renamed "It's A Mets Mets Mets Mets World".

We used to be called "Zombies and Comics and Bears...Oh My!", but the 2½ fans have spoken and they have been heard! The new title reflects a change in the format. After all, what do zombies have to do with the Mets, other than the fact that they walk like Luis Castillo?

Some of the regular features from ZCB will continue to be posted on IAM4W (That's the best abbreviation I can come up with for this site. If you have a better suggestion, please feel free to make them. Anything is better than IAM4W. It makes me sound like a George W. Bush supporter). Joey will also be returning to give us his bear's eye view of the Mets. These features will make their return:

• Injured Player of The Week Award
• Joey's Soapbox
• Newsdesk
• Mets Song Parodies
  

There will also be some new features as well. The comments from the readers will determine whether they become regular features or if they will be traded to some other site for a feature to be named later. These new features are:

• Useless Stat of The Day
• Sponsored By The Number ???
• I Hate Joe Orsulak: Pond Scum of The Week

Hopefully, I can also persuade a fellow Mets blogger or two to submit guest blogs in the spirit of IAM4W. That will guarantee actual quality and give the site credibility, much like Keith Hernandez did to the Mets in 1983 and the opposite of what Joe Orsulak did to the Amazins in 1993.

That's all for now. I hope you enjoy the new direction and as always, please leave comments about anything that's on your mind, be they positive or negative. Any comments are better than no comments. Let's Go Mets!

Breaking News: Billy Wagner Claimed Off Waivers By...

This is Joey Beartran with a special report that I'm breaking right now on ZCB. This is probably because I'm the only reporter here tonight. Where is everybody?

Anyway, there have been numerous reports circulating throughout the blogosphere about Billy Wagner being claimed off waivers by several teams.

From foxsports.com, Ken Rosenthal has reported that the Boston Red Sox have claimed Wagner. Mark Miller of Yahoo Sports says that the two Florida teams (Marlins and Rays) have an interest in Wagner as well.

I, however, know where Billy Wagner is going. He wants to be a closer again. Although the Marlins and Rays could use a steady closer, they would have to pick up the remaining $2.7 million of his contract. Neither team spends freely, although the Rays might dip into the piggy bank if they have to.

The Red Sox already have a closer in Jonathan Papelbon. The Mets are already familiar with him from his blown save against them in May when he gave up the replay-aided Omir-acle. Readers of ZCB and the stars of the movie "Jackass" are familiar with Papelbon from his celebratory punches to his own crotch.


Surely, Wagner will not go to a team where he will just be another middle reliever. Plus, he has a no-trade clause in his contract. If he's going to waive it, this cub reporter believes it would be specifically to become a closer for another team.

Who is the mystery team that can guarantee a closer's job to the Sandman? Why, it's the ZCB company softball team!

We already have an All-Star in Cubby Leyro. His glove will allow Wagner to depend less on the strikeout. Fewer strikeouts equals fewer pitches equals less fatigue.

Our big slugger is Rick R. Mortis. Although he tends to break his bats quite often with his powerful swings (along with an occasional bone or three), when he makes contact, the ball flies off his bat. The thunderous sound produced when horsehide meets maple is enough to wake the dead.

If our team keeps the game close and Mortis comes up in a tie game in the bottom of the eighth inning, he'll make sure to give Wagner a save situation in the ninth inning.

Our manager is Billy Bear. He is loved by all his players, as he makes sure all of them get a fair amount of playing time. Wagner would be sure to get into as many games as he wants to for the ZCB team because Billy Bear will do whatever he can to keep his players happy.

Besides, how can any player not want to play for someone who looks like this?

Finally, a closer can only get games to save if his starting pitcher comes through and holds the opposition to few runs. We have a recently expired, I mean, retired pitcher who we just signed to a long-term deal. He's a proven winner and a blogger himself!

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you Curt Schilling. As you can see by the picture to the right, he possesses a devastating split-fingered pitch, shows a lot of heart (sometimes a little too much) and can always intimidate the opposing hitters by showing them his famous bloody sock.

Also, due to recent changes in Schilling's "lifestyle", he no longer requires four days of rest. He can pitch every day and can bridge the gap directly to Wagner. No middle reliever is needed whenever Schilling staggers onto the mound.

There you have it, my friends. The ZCB softball team has claimed
Billy Wagner off waivers. Now the Mets have until Tuesday to trade him to our team. It would behoove them to do it as soon as possible so that Billy can partake in Tuesday Taco Night after the game. Surely, if the promise of being our closer doesn't pique Wagner's interest, Tuesday Taco Night will seal the deal. After all, it's sponsored by Keith Hernandez's mustache...

On behalf of everyone at the ZCB Newsdesk, I'd like to welcome Billy Wagner to our company softball team! Now if we could only get our cassette player working properly so it could play "Enter Sandman" without the tape being eaten up inside the tape deck, things would be perfect!

The Citi Field Cat Takes Its Latest Victim

After all this time being the sole representative of the so-called "core of four" not to miss time due to an injury, David Wright has now joined shortstop Jose Reyes, centerfielder Carlos Beltran and first baseman Carlos Delgado in the walking wounded category.

As you probably already know, during the fourth inning of Saturday's 5-4, 10-inning loss to the San Francisco Giants, David Wright was hit near the left ear flap of his batting helmet by a Matt Cain fastball, estimated to be traveling at 93 MPH. He was given a CT scan and was diagnosed with a concussion. Although he was released from the hospital Sunday morning, he will continue to be monitored for his PCS (post-concussion symptoms). As a result, the Mets placed Wright on the 15-day disabled list for the first time in his career. He will be eligible to come off the DL on September 1.

The Citi Field Cat from Opening Day has now claimed every position player from the Opening Day lineup except Daniel Murphy. All of the other everyday players have either spent time on the DL or missed games due to injuries, with the most recent being Luis Castillo when he missed four games after falling down the Citi Field dugout steps. If Murphy is to survive the rest of the season uninjured, he should recruit some help to rid the Mets of the Curse of the Citi Field Cat. There are a few candidates to consider for the job, including Muttley and Underdog.













Muttley was intereviewed by Murphy for the job, but was immediately rejected once Murphy conducted a background check. Muttley was discovered to have been affiliated with the Really Rottens, a team of mischievous criminals whose main purpose was to foil the Yogi Yahooeys and the Scooby Doobies in order to earn gold medals in the Laff-A-Lympics.

In addition to his affiliation with the Really Rottens, he was also spotted often in the company of Dick Dastardly. Together, they were spotted in their "flying machines" trying to stop a messenger pigeon, which they failed to do repeatedly. If Muttley could not stop the pigeon, what chance would he have of capturing the Citi Field Cat? REJECTED!

Underdog was a different story. Murphy found his qualifications to be excellent and was impressed by how affable he was. His many years of service as a superhero appeared to make him a fine choice to take on the cursed cat. Unfortunately, right before Murphy could say "you're hired", he came across one minor detail about our costumed canine that was going to cause a problem.

You see, Underdog tended to speak in rhymes. When he entered the interview room, he greeted Murphy with his trademark "never fear, Underdog is here". This wouldn't have been a problem, except that the cat who cursed the Mets has been named the Citi Kitty. Murphy was afraid that Underdog would side with the cat because of his rhyming name. REJECTED!

That only left one candidate to consider. Since he was the only one left who came in for the job, he was immediately hired. Who will now be protecting Daniel Murphy from the so-called Citi Kitty?

That's right, Mets fans! McGruff the Crime Dog is now on the job! With him on the job, no cat would dare enter the field. Daniel Murphy will be spared the fates suffered by Wright, Reyes, Beltran and Delgado.

McGruff's résumé includes speaking against the use of drugs and bullying. He also has spoken about safety and encourages kids to stay in school. Now he is given the daunting task of keeping fellow Irishman Daniel Murphy on the field. (McGruff is an Irish name, right?)


Once McGruff does what Muttley and Underdog were not hired to do, Citi Field can be a player-friendly ballpark again. The cat doesn't stand a chance against McGruff. Let's just hope that while he's searching for the cat, he doesn't come across Shake Shack in center field. If he does, he might be taking a bite out of a Shake Shack burger when he should be taking a bite out of crime.

Kiti Field Photo/Graphic by Metstradamus

Injured Player of The Week Award: Week of 8/9-8/15

There is no joking around with this week's recipient of the Injured Player of The Week Award. It goes to a member of the Mets who had stayed healthy all year until his horrific close encounter with a fastball thrown by Giants pitcher Matt Cain. This week's award goes to Mets third baseman David Wright.

Along with Daniel Murphy, Wright had been the only everyday player from the Mets' opening day lineup in Cincinnati who had not missed time due to injuries. However, he will now be missing an undisclosed number of games due to the concussion he suffered during Saturday's 5-4 loss to San Francisco.

Wright will remain at the Hospital For Special Surgery in Manhattan for further observation to determine the severity of the concussion. Fortunately, the CT scan did not reveal any other damage other than the concussion.

It is unfortunate that Matt Cain will not be making another appearance at Citi Field this season. However, Mets fans will always remember his name and are sure to voice their displeasure when he returns to New York in 2010. I hope either Johan Santana or Oliver Perez takes the mound on the day Cain pitches. Johan will surely defend Wright's name with a tight pitch and Ollie would just hit him and say it was his usual bout of wildness.

Get well soon, David. We at ZCB would like this to be the only time you're presented with the IPW Award so that you don't have to look like this when you accept it:

One more word of advice to Matt Cain. Watch yourself the next time you come to New York. A friend of ZCB (and fellow Mets blogger) by the name of Tanya might have a special welcoming party for you. You may end up being a future recipient of the Injured Player of The Week Award if she and her fellow Mets fans have their way with you. Be afraid, be very afraid.

Once again, get well soon, David. Our thoughts and prayers are with you for a quick and complete recovery!

From The ZCB Newsdesk: August 15, 2009

We interrupt the blog that I wasn't yet writing for this special report. I'm Joey Beartran. Now listen to my news.

David Wright was hit in the head by a 94 MPH fastball thrown by Giants' pitcher Matt Cain today. After remaining motionless on the ground for a few minutes, Wright was able to get up under his own power, although he looked dazed and disoriented.

He was later taken to the Hospital For Special Surgery in Manhattan for a CT scan. The results of that scan were negative. However, he suffered a concussion and will remain hospitalized overnight.

Our ZCB news crew attempted to get a video or photo of Wright in the hospital to see if his head has swollen due to the blow it received. They were turned away, but not before they were given this comment by an unnamed hospital administrator:

"Mr. Wright cannot be photographed because the flash bulb would exacerbate his concussion. If you must know what he looks like, please use this as a reference."

Our investigative reporter brought back the item given to him by the hospital administrator, which I will now share with you as a ZCB exclusive photo.


Apparently, David Wright looks fine. This picture does look quite a bit like the David Wright Fathead I have in my Bear Cave. Wait a minute...it is a David Wright Fathead!

Oh, I get it! Wright gets plunked in the head, it swells up and now he resembles a real life Fathead. The hospital administrator has jokes. Hey, so-called ZCB investigative reporter! Did she tell you "I'll be here all week" when you went up to her? That does it. You're fired! Good luck on the unemployment line. Here's a piece of cardboard so you can update your résumé on it.

This has been Joey Beartran at the ZCB Newsdesk and I don't care about the news anymore!

Survival of The Dead: New Romero flick or Mets' September Goal

King of the zombie subgenre of horror movies, George A. Romero (bow before his picture! He is to zombie movies what Keith Hernandez is to mustachioed men!) has announced that the sixth installment of his "Dead" series will make its world premiere at the Toronto Internationl Film Festival in September. "Survival of The Dead" will feature Romero's trademark social commentary hidden beneath the sea of gore and pig intestines.

However, is the title of his new film also appropriate to describe what the Mets have to do as they approach the last month of the 2009 baseball season?

Several players have experienced what were originally classified minor injuries and have turned them into season-long maladies. Carlos Delgado will not be coming back in mid-August as was originally stated. He will be fighting for his next contract from the trainer's table. Jose Reyes has had plenty of time to fidget with his new hairstyle while he has been "recovering" from his injury. Carlos Beltran might be closest to returning, but is it a good thing if he does?

The zombies clearly studied how Luis Castillo makes his way around the bases.

I have a feeling Citi Field was built on a cemetery that did not have the bodies exhumed properly. That could explain two things. First, it could be the reason for the abundance of injuries suffered by the Mets this season. Also, it could explain why it's taken so long for the players to return to full strength, as a zombie bite is not quick to heal.

In fact, if I were Omar Minaya, I'd trade some of the players away before they start to decompose. At least that way, the Mets can get something in return, preferably a player with a pulse. We already got Victor Zombie-rano once. We don't need another similar player.

Victor Zombie-rano would give up homers to everyone, including current Met pitcher Livan Hernandez.

George A. Romero will make zombie fans such as myself giddy with "Survival of the Dead" next month. Let's hope the Mets can survive September as well as they can. It's too bad their season died a long time ago...

ZCB Special Report: David Wright was hit in the head by a 94 MPH fastball thrown by Giants' pitcher Matt Cain. This occurred approximately one hour after this blog was published. Dig up those bodies at Citi Field already! Daniel Murphy is the only one left from the Mets' Opening Day lineup in Cincinnati that hasn't missed time due to injuries.

Joey's Soapbox: How To Score Vs. Padres, No Pets At Petco, Mighty Mouse

It might be a beautiful day, but it's ugly inside my head. The Mets continue to lose to inferior teams and now I must release by getting on my soapbox. Today's rants will be about the proper way to score against the Padres, the conundrum that is Petco Park and Mighty Mouse!

How To Score Vs. Padres

Since 2007, the Mets have lost 8 of 9 games at Petco Park. Half of those losses came by one run. Last night's game would have been a one-run loss had Everth Cabrera's walk-off shot stayed in the park. Also, the Mets have scored two runs or less in five of the eight losses. They followed the same script last night when they scored two runs in the first inning and then hit the snooze button for the remaining eight innings, wasting a rare stellar effort by Oliver Perez.

If the Mets want to learn how to score runs against San Diego, all they have to do is study this picture of then-Colorado Rockie Matt Holliday from the 2007 Wild Card play-in game.



Notice the face plant into home plate. Replays showed that Matt Holliday might not have touched home, but the umpire was so impressed with his effort that he was called safe, sending the Rockies into the 2007 playoffs.

The Mets have been showing team solidarity by growing beards. The extra chin fur would give them additional protection when they slide face first into home. If they can get over the fear of French kissing the ground and don't mind removing pebbles caught in their stubble, the Mets might be able to pull out a few more victories at Petco Park.

No Pets At Petco

I find it odd that other than the occasional Dog Day at the Ballpark, there are no pets allowed at Petco Park. How can a ballpark named after a company that has the best interest of pets in mind not allow them to patronize their facility? Does that mean I can't see my Metsies play there?

Let's look up the dictionary definition of "pet" to see what it says:

pet (pet), n.

1. An animal kept for amusement or companionship.
2. An object of the affections.
3. A person especially loved or indulged; a favorite: the teacher's pet

It appears I am a pet. All three definitions apply to me. I believe a boycott of Petco is in order. They won't be able to keep my kind out for long!

Mighty Mouse

I'm not talking about the cartoon character. I'm talking about the Mets' diminutive lefty, Billy Wagner. He is pitching well during his rehab assignment and should be promoted to the Mets at some point during the next homestand. He is also trying to earn a lucrative deal when he becomes a free agent.

Meanwhile, Speedy Gonzalez (Francisco Rodriguez) has been running out of gas after blowing by hitters on the Fastball Expressway. After a brilliant first half, he has been merely mortal, racking up blown save after blown save.


Apparently, the lack of activity since the All-Star Break has caused Frankie to become lazy. He has metamorphosed from Speedy Gonzalez to his cousin, Slowpoke Rodriguez! This change has been responsible for his recent poor outings, including his first back-to-back blown saves as a Met.

I propose that the Mets give Billy Wagner some save opportunities down the stretch. If Frankie is going to continue his downward spiral, then Billy should be given the ball in the ninth inning. After all, who would you trust with the game on the line? Mighty Mouse or Slowpoke Rodriguez?

Final Thoughts

How To Score Vs. Padres: Don't ever shave, Metsies! If you do, it'll just be another excuse for not scoring any runs against the Padres.

No Pets At Petco: What do we want? To see the game! When do we want it? NOW!

Mighty Mouse: Here I come to save the day! So I'll push Slowpoke out of the way!

Injured Player of The Week Award: Week of 8/1-8/7

The ZCB Injured Player of The Week Award could go to any number of candidates. As usual, there was no shortage of injuries over the past seven days. Let's take a look at this week's nominations:

Luis Castillo: After grounding out on August 4, he took a stumble down the dugout steps, injuring his leg. He has not played since he became acquainted with the dugout floor.

Jonathon Niese: He covered first base awkwardly during a failed attempt to complete a double play on August 5. After throwing his first warmup pitch to test his leg, he collapsed in a heap on the mound. Niese had to be helped off the field and will now miss the rest of the season after suffering a complete tear of his upper right hamstring tendon.

Gary Sheffield: Sheffield hit a line drive off the left field wall at Citi Field on August 5. What appeared to be an easy double turned into a painful single, as Sheffield aggravated the hamstring injury that put him on the 15-day DL in July. Although he has been able to take batting practice, he has not started a game since Wednesday.

So who wins this week's award? Although Luis Castillo's injury gave him a pretty cool nickname (Luis "I now use two hands, but not on the handrail" Castillo), this week's award goes to...

SEAN "NO NECK" GREEN!

In a shocking upset, Sean Green is the recipient of the IPW award. He came into the game on August 4 in the tenth inning. The game was tied 7-7, with the bases loaded and two men out. Mark DeRosa was Green's first batter as Albert PooHoles salivated on deck. One pitch later, DeRosa went ouchie as Green forced in the go-ahead run with a hit batsman. With the bases still loaded, Green was left in the game to pitch to PooHoles, who feasted on an 0-2 pitch by launching it into the left field seats for a grand slam. Green did not watch the pitch leave the ballpark as he has no neck.

Green then forgot about his secret identity as the masked adventurer, Captain Obvious, when he offered this quip to reporters after the game:

"That's not how I had it planned out."

For his achievements in giving Mark DeRosa a boo boo, giving Mets fans a brain cramp and inadvertently revealing his secret identity to the world, ZCB presents Sean Green with the Injured Player of The Week Award. He may not be physically injured right now, but he should be.

Song Parody Time! Bummer in The Citi!

The Lovin' Spoonful was a pop/folk/rock band who had their fifteen minutes of fame in the mid-sixties. Their first single, "Do You Believe In Magic" peaked at #9 in 1965. Their follow-up hit the following year became their first #1 hit and their trademark song.

"Summer In The City" spent three weeks at #1 in August 1966 and has been covered by an eclectic array of acts. Musicians from BB King to Quincy Jones to Joe Cocker have performed versions of the song, as well as bands such as Styx and The Butthole Surfers. Now it's my turn to cover it for ZCB! Here's my latest song parody. This one is called "Bummer In The Citi" and the story behind the song should be self-expanatory if you've followed the Mets this season:

I'm down; bummer in the Citi
Sayin' what the heck as the Mets plays sh*tty
Players down; isn't it a pity?
I'll just blame the injuries on the kitty.

All around, players looking half-dead
Falling down the dugout steps, shaking all of our heads.

For other teams, it's a different world
This team just makes me hurl
Come on, come on, no end in sight
Trainers feeling heat; we're not all right

And Jerry, we all feel your pity
That this craze has us feeling your plight
In the bummer in the Citi
In the bummer in the Citi.

Men down, when they play at Citi
Injured all the time, not lookin' real pretty
Here, cat! Searching for the kitty
The one from the opener that cursed the Citi
Ain't easy but I'm never gonna stop
PETA, I don't care but he's flyin' from the rooftop!

For other teams, it's a different world
This team just makes me hurl
Come on, come on, no end in sight
Trainers feeling heat; we're not all right

And Jerry, we all feel your pity
That this craze has us feeling your plight
In the bummer in the Citi
In the bummer in the Citi.

(Cheesy instrumental break)

I'm down; bummer in the Citi
Sayin' what the heck as the Mets plays sh*tty
Players down; isn't it a pity?
I'll just blame the injuries on the kitty.

All around, players looking half-dead
Falling down the dugout steps, shaking all of our heads.

For other teams, it's a different world
This team just makes me hurl
Come on, come on, no end in sight
Trainers feeling heat; we're not all right

And Jerry, we all feel your pity
That this craze has us feeling your plight
In the bummer in the Citi
In the bummer in the Citi.

The Opening Night Cat Cursed The Mets!

It was April 13, 2009. Citi Field was hosting its first regular season game between the Mets and the Padres. The team was intact and ready to make a run at the division title. The Phillies' two-year reign as National League East champions was going to be a fading memory once the Mets steamrolled over the opposition. A funny thing happened on the way to the coronation. Citi Field had an uninvited guest on Opening Night as a cat found its way onto the field near the Mets dugout.

(Click here for the video of the Opening Night cat at Kitty...I mean Citi Field.)

Now I wouldn't have had a problem if this orange cat had been a crimefighter. If his alter ego was Clark Cat and he worked at a major metropolitan newspaper, then all would be fine. I would have felt safe with him running around on the field. I'd assume he was trying to protect the Mets.



However, this cat was clearly not super in any way. In fact, it may have been related to the cat that supposedly cursed the Chicago Cubs in 1969 at Shea Stadium. At Citi Field, photographers captured the cat as he worked his way onto the warning track near the on-deck circle. Notice the similarities between that picture and the picture of the black cat walking near the Cubs dugout in 1969.












The Citi Field cat ran behind Mets third baseman David Wright as he was on deck. The 1969 black cat walked behind Cubs third baseman Ron Santo as he was on deck. Wright is arguably the best third baseman in Mets history. Similarly, Santo is considered to be the best third baseman in Cubs history. After the black cat made its appearance at Shea, the Cubs went into a freefall as the Mets passed them in the standings and eventually went on to win their first World Series.

The Citi Field cat decided to take a jog on the Mets side of the field. The Mets were healthy before the cat cursed them. Now half the team is getting hurt, both on the field (Niese and Sheffield today) and coming off the field (Luis "I now use two hands, but not on the handrail" Castillo).

Forget the trainers and medical staff employed by the 2009 Mets. The CAT-astrophe that this season has become is all due in part to the events that transpired in the third inning on Opening Night at Citi Field on the 13th of April. (It had to be on the 13th as well!)

Cats have a way of deciding the fate of baseball teams in New York. It's too bad that this particular tabby chose to curse the Mets this season instead of the rest of the National League!

P.S. There is no truth to the rumor that the orange cat that infected the Mets season in 2009 was a zombie, even if this picture says otherwise.

Even Bruce Willis' "Unbreakable" Character Would Get Hurt On This Mets Team

To call the Mets injury-prone this season would be an understatement. Nearly half of the Mets players on the 25-man roster have spent some time on the disabled list. Most of the boo-boos have been traditional baseball injuries that have taken place on the field, such as Carlos Delgado's hip injury and Carlos Beltran's bone bruise. Now the injuries are just becoming freaky.

In the series opener against the Cardinals Tuesday night, Luis Castillo was walking back to the dugout after leading off the seventh inning with a groundout. As he made his way down the dugout steps, he took a tumble and had to be helped back to the trainer's room with what was later diagnosed as a mild sprain of his left ankle. His current status is day-to-day.

Today the Mets sent rookie pitcher Jonathon Niese to the mound. While covering first base in a failed attempt to complete a double play, Niese landed awkwardly. He was allowed to throw warmup pitches on the mound to make sure he could continue pitching. After his first pitch, he crumbled to the ground, agonizingly grabbing his right leg. After lying on the mound for a few minutes, Niese was helped off the field. He did not appear to put any pressure on his right leg as he was carried off the field with what was later diagnosed as a right hamstring strain.

If you recall, Niese was called up to replace Fernando Nieve in the rotation when Nieve got hurt. Nieve was called up to replace J.J. Putz on the roster when Putz got hurt. The Mets are now halfway to six degrees of ankle separation. Nelson Figueroa replaced Niese on the mound in the second inning and later hit a two-run triple in the bottom of the inning. Fortunately, Figgy did not get hurt while legging out his three-base hit.

It's gotten to the point where I truly believe that Bruce Willis' character in the movie "Unbreakable" would get hurt on this team.

If you haven't seen this movie by famed Chubby Checker fan M. Night Shyamalan ("Come on, baby, let's make a movie with a twist."), I'll give you a quick plot summary. Willis plays David Dunn, a security guard from Philadelphia (Boo, Philly!) who is the only survivor of a train crash. Not only does he survive an accident in which everyone else perished, he doesn't have a scratch on his body. He then meets Elijah Price (played by Samuel L. Jackson. The "L" stands for motherf**ker.), a comic book enthusiast who is on the permanent disabled list with osteogenesis imperfecta, a disease that causes his bones to break with ease.

Without spoiling the ending for you, Dunn discovers why he can't get injured. This leads to the stunning denouement (Keith Hernandez would probably say "that's French for 'denouement'.") that explains why Price has taken such an interest in David Dunn.

If Dunn were truly unbreakable, he'd sign a contract with the Mets. At the very least, he could become part of the team's medical staff. Then again, we're talking about the 2009 Mets here. He might be able to survive a train wreck in Philadelphia, but he'd probably get injured getting off the 7 train in New York while reporting for his first day on the job.

Joey's Happy Recap: Angel Slams The Door!

Note: This blog was partially taken from the recap I wrote from tonight's game on MMO. Click here for the original version of that recap. However, Joey decided he wanted to do his own recap since it was Build-A-Bear Night at Citi Field and to him, that's like a National Holiday for bears. Take it away, Joey.


Hi, readers! This is Joey and welcome to my first recap. I attended tonight's Mets game and came home with yet another brother. You can see him in the picture above. That's Billy Bear. The other bear in the picture is Jerry. He was the first bear to end my status as only child. Enough about my family. Let's get to the happy recap of tonight's 9-6 Mets victory!

It seems fitting that on Build-A-Bear Night at Citi Field, the Mets would come out their two-game hibernation. Their 12-hit attack on the Diamondbacks’ pitchers, capped by Angel Pagan’s eighth-inning grand slam, fueled the Mets to a 9-6 victory Saturday night over Arizona.

Pagan picked a perfect time to hit the first home run of his Mets career, as his shot into the left field seats broke a 5-5 tie. Angel had been one of the most consistent hitters on the Mets since becoming an everyday player and was hitting long doubles and triples, so it was only a matter of time before he would launch his first homer.

Personally, I think he should have something edible named after him, like Reggie Jackson had the "Reggie" candy bar named after him centuries ago in the 70's. Perhaps some Angel Food Cake would do the trick. I'd certainly go for that!

Before Pagan’s heroics in the eighth inning, the game had been a back-and-forth affair. Arizona put the first two runs up on the board on a first inning home run into the second deck by Justin Upton and a fourth-inning RBI single by Augie Ojeda. The D-Backs might have scored more if not for a brilliant Houdini act pulled by Oliver Perez in the third inning. Arizona loaded the bases with nobody out when Perez struck out Mark Reynolds and induced an inning-ending double play by Chris Snyder. Daniel Murphy scooped the ball out of the dirt to complete the twin killing after he had practiced the play before the game. On WFAN, Howie Rose and Wayne Hagin reported that Mets coach Sandy Alomar was throwing balls in the dirt to Murphy from second base to teach him how to properly scoop poor throws from the second baseman. What a great day to practice that drill!

The Mets stormed back in the bottom of the fourth inning and Angel Pagan was crucial in that four-run rally as well. Daniel Murphy, Jeff Francoeur and Cory Sullivan all singled to produce the first run of the inning. Alex Cora then tied the game with a groundout to second base. The Mets took their first lead of the game when Brian Schneider hit a long double to center field, scoring Cory Sullivan from third base. After Oliver Perez delivered a line-drive single to right, advancing Schneider to third, Pagan drove in his first run of the game with a sacrifice fly.

I missed Angel's first RBI of the night because I was on a bathroom break. I almost peed my Mets hoodie because this lady saw me and started up a conversation about bears. I thought she was very strange and probably forgot to take her blue and orange pills this morning. She did not seem to care that I really had to go! Bears don't have bladders like non-bears. Once we have to go, there's no holding back!

The D-Backs pulled to within one run on a passed ball by Brian Schneider in the fifth inning, but the lead became two again on Jeff Francoeur’s millionth RBI as a Met. This time, he drove in David Wright on a groundout in the bottom of the fifth.

Oliver Perez was pulled after five workmanlike innings but the Mets could not give him the victory. Bobby Parnell coughed up the lead in the sixth inning, allowing Arizona to tie the game at 5 on an RBI groundout by Gerardo Parra and an RBI single by Justin Upton.

The score remained tied at 5 until the the Angel Pagan Show went back on the air in the eighth inning. The 7-8-9 hitters for the Mets all reached base on a walk and two singles, setting up Pagan’s grand moment.

Speaking of grand moments, what do you think of this picture of me in the field level seats during batting practice? Do you think I should apply to be the Mets' official rally bear? If so, I'd like to request a small helmet because a lot of those batting practice balls were coming very close to where I was sitting!

I’d like to thank Brian Stokes for allowing a run and putting another runner on base. That allowed Francisco Rodriguez to pick up his first save in three weeks, as he got Miguel Montero to pop up to Luis Castillo to end the game. Castillo made sure to catch Frankie’s last pitch of the game with two hands.

With tonight’s victory, the Mets upped their record to 50-53, making Tuesday the earliest possible day they will be shaving. For those not in the know, the Mets have vowed to grow their beards out until they reach the .500 mark. They remained 6½ games out of the wild-card spot.

Build-A-Bear Night proved to be a winning formula for the Mets and their fans. I was fortunate enough to be in attendance at the game and I must say, Angel Pagan definitely made the fur fly at Citi Field. Let’s hope the good vibes spill over into Sunday’s game.

That's my happy recap. I hope you enjoyed it. If I ever feel like writing after a Mets' loss, I will call it "Joey's Crappy Recap". That probably won't happen because usually after every loss, I like to drown my sorrows in cake. One more picture of us at today's game before I bid you adieu! It was taken where third base used to be at Shea Stadium (my place of birth). Memories...Adieu! (Gesundheit!)